U.S.
Department of Justice Prosecutor Hur: Biden will appear to a jury as an “elderly
man with a poor memory.”
Biden:
My memory is fine.
Biden’s
White House staff: You are behind in the polls.
Biden’s
Counsel: If Trump is elected, the next Attorney General may prosecute you for absconding with
government documents.
Biden
in Public: I have decided not to run again.
Biden
among his lawyers and counsellors: My memory is poor—meaning: the Government
cannot prosecute me—I have no memory, so I cannot meaningfully participate in my
own criminal defense.
The Press: In giving up a second term in office, Biden’s motives are entirely laudatory, publicly spirited, altruistic, and patriotic. Nothing like self-interest involved here.
Chief
Wiggum: Nothing to see, move along.
Seth Barrett Tillman, ‘Fact or Fiction?: Thinking Outside the Box,’ New Reform Club (July 22, 2024, 3:15 PM), <https://reformclub.blogspot.com/2024/07/thinking-outside-box.html>;
