Being a Reform Club member has to count for something, especially after the novelty of the secret decoder ring wears off.
So now we are offering a prepublication glimpse at an article whose other millions of readers have to contain themselves until tomorrow.
Yes, it's just what you have been waiting for: an omnibus article cataloguing some of the distinctive features of the modern-day Democrat and Republican.
And if I must offer a little teaser of a taste to get you to chew on our links, here is a mere morsel:
IF YOU'RE too dumb to figure out a butterfly ballot, then you're probably trying to vote for that smart Democrat Presidential candidate. If you are smart enough to handle the ballot, you are probably voting for that dumb Republican.
If you're afraid to take a magnetic resonance image because your nose ring might stick to the magnet, you're a Democrat. If you're afraid to bob for apples at the church carnival because your tie might fall into the water, you're a Republican.
As our good friend Homer would say, "It's funny because it's true."
ReplyDeleteActually, Homer said, "It's funny because it's not me." And he was talking about the movie "Red Ashphalt."
ReplyDeleteJay's piece is only funny because it's what intellectual Republicans like to think makes them better than gutter Republicans. Really, it's no better than Ann Coulter.
If you own a copy of the Kama Sutra, you're a Democrat. If you own any books on military history, you're surely a Republican.
ReplyDeleteThere you go, Tom, buying into the myth that Democrats have boring sex lives and need to find books describing the pretzel position - in hopes that a weird configuration might relieve the monotony.
ReplyDeleteI do, however, agree with your contention that Republicans know how to really make it enjoyable: actually loving your partner.
I can live with "no better than Ann Coulter," James. I'm easy.
ReplyDeleteYes, you did beg the question, tbm, as in putting your answer in your premise. :-)
ReplyDeleteI suppose the answer is, then, that everybody does it. The only difference is that Republicans feel guilty about it afterwards.
If you own a copy of the Kama Sutra, you're a Democrat. If you own any books on military history, you're surely a Republican
ReplyDeleteI own both. What does that make me?
A New Democrat.
ReplyDeleteI own both. What does that make me?
ReplyDeleteA New Democrat.
Is that the kind that pastes a "Make Love and War" bumpersticker on his hybrid Hummer?