Monday, November 08, 2004

Garrison Keillor and I Finally Divorce

During my long drives home from college back in the late eighties and early nineties, I passed the time wearing out an old cassette full of material from Garrison Keillor's Prairie Home Companion. My enjoyment from the show has diminished as the once genial entertainer has become less of a delightful monologuist and tale spinner and more like any ordinary angry liberal. The famed Powerlineblog brought this little bit of transcript loveliness to my attention:

"We're over it. We've moved on. We're just fine. The election was days ago. Days ago. Much has happened since then. We've practically forgotten about it here [laughter] in our rush to enter into new activities, new frontiers, new projects. I am now the chairman of a national campaign to pass a constitutional amendment to take the right to vote away from born-again Christians. [enthusiastic audience applause] Just a little project of mine. My feeling is that born-again people are citizens of heaven, that is where there citizenship is, [laughter] is in heaven, it's not here among us in America. If you feel that war in the Middle East is simply prophecy fulfilled, if you believe that tribulation and suffering are just the natural conditions of life, if you believe that higher education is vanity, unnecessary, there is only one book that one need to read, if you feel that unemployment is -[glitch]- dependent on him and drawn you closer to him. [laughter] If you feel -[glitch]- lousy healthcare is a portal to paradise, [applause] then you don't really share our same interests, do you? No, you do not."

1 comment:

  1. Garrison Keillor. Another member of the Politburo (along with Jesse Jackson, Barry Lynn, etc.) who have been rolled out by PBS and the networks since the 1970s. Old men in furry white hats, viewing the grand parade from their perch every year, far above the crowd. Reassured of their superiority, they return to the blank, dank structures they inhabit. Meanwhile, the world has passed them by. It's a new day, ladies and germs, and the lethargy of the left is no more evident than in their lack of new leaders. They have a few new loudmouths (Dean, Moore, Franken) but no leadership beyond the Clintons. Keillor will soon be embalmed in the great hall next to Lenin and Mao, as a museum curiosity. But despite his public funding and niche chic, he is no more than a dust bunny in the corner of history. A man of a few witticisms and a heart opposed to Christ. The next life awaits you, Garrison, see, Brezhnev beckons!

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